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herdarlinsin.diaryland

10:40 a.m. :: 2005-10-09

herdarlinsin.diaryland

user-name: 0/1
I don't like the username.
contact: 5/4
Tag board, Notes, E-mail, Guest Book
layout: 2/10
It's really hard to see the links. The picture is kinda neat, but it's really poorly put into the template. If you took out the extra box behind then entry, put it behind the links and made the entry text black, and moved the links to the left of the entry, and made the entry box smaller it would be a big improvement.
spacing & readablity: 5/10
The spacing is fine, but the all italics and coloring makes it frustraiting to look at.

[12/25]

& a woman in waiting

title: 5/5
It's totally origional and suiting.
opening: 9/10
"Images formed through a half / Broken glass frame" That's a totally cool opening full of imagry. As soon as someone begins to read an image is in their head. It is just a tad confusing on a third or fourth read-through. How can something be half broken?
closing: 7/10
I like the usage of bold, and the way you spaced it out with only a few words on each line. However, as I've said before, an ending of a poem should leave you were a certain feeling that the auther desires. I feel no sense of satisfaction or understanding at the end. It makes me shrug and think "on to the next." The idea is good, it just needs something less dramatic and more real sounding for presentation.
appealing & style: 4/10
The all italics really takes back from the meaning of the poem. The spacing is interesting, but the emphasis it puts in certain places gives it a weird rythm that I find really unappealing.
relate to it: 6/10
I might relate a little. This poem makes me think of all the years I spent without a friend, playing in my room by myself.
rhyme & rhythm: 2/10
The adding of rhyme might be a really good addition to this poem. I feel it needs more to it.
spelling & grammer: 10/10
Very good.
like it: 5/10
I don't have a feeling toward it really.

[46/75]

Total: 58/100
Sorry hun. Make a few layout changes, and submit another poem not in italics. Your presentation is what made the score so low.

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